Brilliant Strategy?

A friend recently asked, why do women do this to each other?

She was referring to a Facebook post where a woman described what she called the most awkward first date in history. The text of the message says, “She ordered milk with her dinner…and specified her preferred milk fat percentage. For dinner she ordered the kids menu dino nuggets w/ extra ketchup.”

First of all, arrogant of her to assume she could lay claim to such a prestigious title.

Second, what’s wrong with milk and dino nuggets? Maybe it was the extra ketchup? I mean some restaurants are known for being stingy with condiments so that seems like a valid request right?

My friend’s objection to the post was that women should not be food shaming other women. I completely agree. I also believe that no one, regardless of their gender or age, should shame or be shamed over anything they eat, no matter what it is.

Food is fuel and nobody but you gets to decide if that fuel is adequate for your body. For many people that’s all food is, but for many others food is so much more. Again, nobody but you gets to decide what food means for you.

When I replied to my friend, I told her that I agreed with her stance on food shaming, but that I also saw that post from a slightly different angle. I suggested that maybe the dino nugget order had actually been a test and the food shamer fell right into the trap and failed miserably.

What if the milk and nuggets were a deliberate choice to find out if there would be a second date? Maybe this is how she weeds out those who won’t be tolerant or easygoing or fun loving? A strategy to see who won’t be any good at letting her be her authentic self?

This does seem somewhat manipulative, especially if it’s not something you would normally order with family and friends and you are doing it only as a test. But if it’s a meal you would also order three dates, or weeks, or months into the relationship, then I think it’s a brilliant strategy and anyone going out on a first date should seriously consider employing it.

Be well my friends.

3 thoughts on “Brilliant Strategy?”

      1. It’s basically to weed out the narcissists.

        Find something to give a simple “no” to, like if you’re planning your third date maybe and they’re like “ok for our next date let’s go sky diving”. Simply say “no”. No excuses, no explanation, just remembering that no is a complete sentence. Narcissists will lose their shit “what? What do you mean no? You said it was my turn to plan the date and I want to go sky diving! Are you seriously not going to go with me? I thought we had a good thing going here and now you’re ruining it” blah blah blah.

        Empathetic people will respond with some sort of “you’re right, that’s pretty extreme for a third date. Is skydiving something you’d be interested in eventually? Or are you afraid of heights and it’s a hard pass for you? I’ve always wanted to go sky diving and I’d love to share the experience with someone but I don’t mind if that means you’re taking pictures of me from the ground, at least I know someone wants to support me while I’m skydiving. Ok, so no skydiving next week, what about we go explore Estes park instead?”

        Liked by 1 person

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