Lesbian Time

Saw this meme on Facebook. No idea who originally posted it, but I laughed really hard when I saw it. It’s not quite that bad, but it really can feel this way sometimes. It can be a real nightmare.

You’ve got the gold stars who won’t even engage, the predators and narcissists who are very good at their camouflage, and the women who live across the country or in another country altogether. Then there the others just like me who haven’t got a clue what they’re doing.

When you do find someone you connect with, then you encounter the truly terrifying rollercoaster called Lesbian Time. Depending on who you ask about this phenomenon you’ll get different answers as to how to tell time this way.

Some say the ratio is 1=7. Others are more complicated; one minute = three hours, one week = a month, one month = three months.  All agree it is greatly accelerated compared to hetero relationships, making the feelings so intense.

I’ve experienced it with every woman I’ve dated, not that there are very many. I can’t seem to figure out how not to do it.

Catching feelings when you connect with someone is exhilarating. You text almost non-stop for two or three days which feels likes you’ve known them for weeks or months. Then all of sudden there’s radio silence for an hour or two, which feels like days, and you start to get anxious. Did I say something? Are they ok? Are they working and I forgot their schedule? Did they tell me about an appointment and I forgot? Argh.

Breathe. Don’t panic. If they really are ghosting you there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. Don’t sit around waiting for them. You’ve got a life to live.

If they aren’t ghosting you, the advice is still the same.  They’ll check in soon and both of you will be glad that you are a whole person, independent and strong.

Each time I start a new relationship, I’ll have to remind myself, ‘buckle up buttercup because this is the ride you signed up for’. One day, sooner rather than later I hope, I’ll find my person and that will be the last ride.

Until then, be well my friends.