Y’all my mind has been spinning around those first two questions for weeks now but the answers to those are too nebulous. I am frightened, angry, disgusted, and frankly, fighting off despair. So instead I have to focus on the more mundane or I will go insane.
FYI-the answer was no; I should not have had that third cup of coffee as I spent the rest of the afternoon and into the evening very jittery and on edge. I’m not sleeping well so I thought that a third cup would help but with my nervous system on overload to the point where I flinch when my work computer notifies me of a new email, the last thing I needed was more stimulant in my system. You’d think at my age I would know better, but there you go.
Tennessee and I are both struggling with the chaos that currently is our life but yesterday we got a much-needed reprieve. Her best friend came over with her adorable dog, Madge, and we had homemade vegetable beef soup and cornbread, and we watched “My Big Fat Greek Wedding“. Neither of them had seen it before and they let me talk them into watching it.
(Now when I say “put some Windex on it” they won’t look at me like I’m crazy.)
We had our fireplace going and the rain was falling, and it was a lovely, relaxing evening– very much needed. I’m hoping it helps me to focus on the things I have control of like doing our taxes and starting my microgreen project.
Also, I have finally started writing fiction again, both with my writing class assignments and during my morning sprints with fellow writers. Can I call them “fellow” writers when they are all women? Hmmm.
Anyway, it feels really good to be creating again. I have to keep reminding myself that the time I spend creating is not “wasted” and that, no I should not be washing laundry or emptying the dishwasher instead. Granted these are important things I need to do too, but there is time for both, and both are needed to stave off insanity.
I hope y’all find ways to stay sane and keep your balance. This crazy bumpy ride is going to last for awhile. Take care of yourselves.
This has been a very long couple of weeks. I have started to write this blog several times, but my mind, body, and soul have been so battered and bruised that my limbic system seems to be in a catastrophic meltdown. These past few days I’ve been experiencing headaches that I’m fairly certain are high blood pressure related, but I’ve been too scared to test that theory. One can only be in flight or fight mode for so long before something breaks.
After an agency all-hands meeting to discuss the latest knife twist of this administration, I broke down in tears yet again. My heart was beating way too fast, and I needed to ‘do’ something. Fortunately, we had our first really nice day, so I walked around the backyard for a bit then went over to our fire pit, sat in the Adirondack chair that was fully facing the sun, and just “was.”.
I watched Buddy and Silas explore the yard and periodically come over for me to scratch their ears. I listened to the birds and the neighbors’ dogs and the trucks on 111. I felt the heat from the sun soaking into my black clothes. And slowly, breath by breath, I was finally able to relax. It took nearly 30 minutes before I was able to come back in and face the rest of the day. It has not been the most productive work week of my life but I have been doing my best.
Writing Class
So I was supposed to start a six-week writing class last week but had to miss the first day. One of my book club friends was there though and gave me the assignment, which was “How would I make my community better?” Here’s what I wrote:
I am a new member of this community, and I am different from many who live here though you can’t necessarily tell just by looking at me. I was anxious about how I would fit in. I realize that finding my place here required some of the same steps that I would take to make this community a better place.
First, I joined local organizations, starting with getting my library card. I was happy to see that our library was both literally and figuratively at the center of our town. I even started a book club that meets monthly at the library. As a USAF veteran, I also joined the American Legion. The local Legion and the VFW are very active here. Supporting these organizations has allowed me to interact with many people and begin to make friends.
The next step was to participate in local events. Here’s where being a member of the Legion has helped. For example, I volunteered to assist at the Legion booth during the Fourth of July celebration. I not only helped my chapter raise funds for helping the community, I also got to meet lots of my fellow residents and they got to meet me, and my wife.
Last, but not least, we support local businesses. We enjoy gathering with friends at the Bee Knees to watch the Lady Vols or at Smalltown Ceramics to paint coffee mugs. We shop at Natural Affinity for hand-crafted soaps and lotions and at Hughes for our produce, garden seedlings, and fried pies. Not only does this let us support local business owners, but it also allows them to get to know us.
How then does any of this help our community better? It allows those here who may fear what they think of as ‘other’ to realize that we’re really not that different. It’s a lot more difficult to see someone as ‘other’ when you’ve shared a beer together cheering on the Vols and as a result, people become more open and tolerant of others. Being more open and tolerant citizens makes our community better.
I’m not sure how much I’ll learn in this class but it’s a chance to write every week and to get to know my new friend better. She read my homework essay and asked me if it was working-my attempt to expose my community to an “other” and see that I’m like them-I chuckled and said I was having mixed results.
Here’s the thing though, despite the number of space laser nuts I meet here, I continue to meet folks like my friend, or my American Legion friend I had happy hour drinks with to discuss my not feeling very welcome or safe at the Legion Hall. I am slowly making a community here and that is part of why I’m so upset about being told I have to go back to Denver.
Anyway, back to class on Tuesday. Our assignment for next week is to write on one of three topics: 1) how do I feel about the new airpark that someone is trying to put in; 2) how do I think Trump did his first week in office; or 3) what kind of hamburger would I be?
I could pick another topic if I wanted, but that night I wrote about 180 words on what kind of hamburger I would be. I know next to nothing about the Airpark so don’t have an opinion, the second option would have meant embarrassing tears, so I wrote about the hamburger.
I started by saying I’m most definitely not your dollar menu burger, but neither am I the gold-plated Kobe beef one either. I described what I would consist of then realized I might not be gold-plated, but I am a bit bougie anyway. It was fun and felt good to be writing like that.
I really do want to start posting more regularly and now that I’m taking this class and writing in the mornings with my online writer buddies again maybe I can. Please be patient with me as I try to navigate myself and my family into this next chapter in my life.
“I also want feminism to be led by the nonwhite and the queer, who don’t have the luxury of fighting only misogyny. We must fight the multiple systems of oppressions that patriarchy often intertwines itself with: racism, bigotry, homophobia, transphobia, classism, ableism, and ageism.” – Mona Eltahawy in “The Seven Necessary Sins for Women and Girls”
On this MLK Jr. weekend that coincides with the inauguration of a misogynistic felonious rapist and racist who is the poster boy for all the things wrong with the patriarchy, I thought reading and discussing a book written as a big fuck you to said patriarchy was apropos.
My friends in the book club agreed. I recommended it and we chose this book because we knew we’d be discussing it the day before the inauguration.
It was an intense read. One which I started on Libby and decided to buy so I could underline stuff. The author wrote this during his first term (before Covid) and it is just as relevant, if not more so, today.
The seven necessary sins Mona Eltahawy says are necessary to defy, disobey, and disrupt the patriarchy are only sins because the patriarchy says we as women are not supposed to be or do or want these things. They are: anger, attention, profanity, ambition, power, violence, and lust.
There is a chapter dedicated to each of the sins. Each of them resonated with me in different ways but the one on violence really got me thinking. My wife accuses me of hating men, and I try to tell her that it’s not true, but it is hard not to hate them sometimes.
In the book, Eltahawy talks about attending a conference to discuss ways to end patriarchal and sexual violence against women and children. She says on page 137, “I wanted to kill men. Two intense days of survivor stories left me wondering. “How can I not hate men?!” It is a challenge—genuinely—and one I often surrender to. It is difficult for me not to hate men.”
And I felt this viscerally.
Tennessee is firmly in the ‘not all men’ category, and I’ve asked her more than once, if not all men, then how do I tell which men? When I’m in public or around men I have never met before, how do I know which ones are safe?
I don’t like to upset her, so we don’t talk too much about it, but I find myself very angry at men right now. Complicit white women are definitely on my shit list too.
My wife and I are at different places on our journeys toward trying to defy, disobey, or disrupt the patriarchy and its attending oppressions of racism, homophobia, etc., and that’s okay. We have both been so thoroughly indoctrinated and socialized for so long that it feels like an impossible task.
Sometimes this makes me so angry that I want to punch in the head the next guy who mansplains, patronizes, or disbelieves me or any woman.
I was listening in on the appointment my mother recently had with her new cardiologist. It’s probably a good thing it was audio only and that I had my mic muted. The number of times he said something that was patronizing was too numerous to count. My mother of course didn’t hear any of that as it was couched as charm and concern and was packaged as an older white man in a white coat.
It has been so hard not to give in to anger or to not be overwhelmed by the anxiety produced by the constant uncertainty that seems to be my life right now.
Silas in the Sun with Songbirds
A couple of days ago I had just sat down at my desk with my newly brewed cup of coffee, and I looked over to see my cat, Silas, lying in a patch of sunlight grooming himself. As I watched, the birds outside my window started singing and I felt my body inhale deeply then let go.
Don’t get me wrong I am still anxious and angry, but instead of the nine-out-of-ten intensity level I had been dragging around, it dropped to about a two. In that moment I felt joy and peace and gratitude, and I am trying, moment by moment to hold on to that.
I’m not always successful but by reminding myself to be grateful for what I have, I feel lighter and more capable of withstanding whatever life is about to throw at me. And because I’m married to the most amazing woman, I don’t have to do it alone, no matter how awful it might get. And if it’s not awful, I’ll still have her with me as we move into this next chapter of uncertainty.
Because, of course, the future is always uncertain. And I’m being very dramatic so let me move away from that and talk about other things that have happened since I last dropped some words.
More Books
I read two other book club books:
“The Diamond Eye” by Kate Quinn.
It’s based on the true story of a female Soviet sniper during WWI. It was the suggested read from our local librarian and I found it fascinating. I’ve read lots of books about WWI (mostly from the British or American point of view though also a few from the German side) but this was the first from the Russian side. I think we as Americans often forget that we were once allies.
I enjoyed it so much that I convinced another of my book clubs to make it our February read. I can’t wait to hear the thoughts on this book by these vastly different women.
The other humans in this book club were not big fans of the book and I understood their reasons, and as a reader, I’m not sure I disagree with their assessment. But I read this as a writer too and knowing the author who wrote it and a little about how her mind works (Adrian is a friend of mine I met through a sapphic writers group online), I enjoyed it. The two female MCs are complex, flawed, and interesting, and despite some weird and gross scenes, I’m looking forward to reading the other three books in the set.
It is one of her earlier works and I’ve read one of her most recent series as well and it’s delightful to see how she’s grown as an author. I admit there’s a little jealousy in my admiration of her.
The only other book I’ve read so far this year was my Christmas present, “Kitchen Table Tarot” by Melissa Cynova. It is essentially a Tarot handbook with some history, some tips and a very good explanation of how to get a feel for reading the cards. I’ve used it many times already as I’ve been doing frequent readings for myself.
Above I mentioned the morning when I let go of much of my angst. I was still feeling positive the next day from the ‘Silas in the Sun with Songbirds’ moment so I did a single card reading and asked the Universe, “What should I focus on to keep having moments like that?”
I pulled the Nine of Cups. The first paragraph description for this card in this book reads as follows:
“If the man seated in this card could speak, he would say, “You know, I don’t even have to look over my shoulder to count my blessings. I’m certain of them. I know that even if one cup falls and spills, the other eight will be enough to sustain me, and I will fill the fallen cup back to the brim as soon as I’m able. I am grateful. I am joyful. I am satisfied with life and with my place in it.”
So the Universe has spoken. I will focus on gratitude and joy…or at least I’ll try.
Family
Obviously, I’ve done more than just read four books in the past three weeks. Mom came for a visit and stayed for a week. This was her first visit flying by herself and I’m so proud of her for facing her fears.
As I may have mentioned my mother cannot sit still for long, so she was cooking and baking like crazy. No complaints here. She made beef stew, cabbage burgers, and her famous Christmas cookies (some of which there may or may not be any left to share with those we might have promised to save some for).
My nephew also came for a surprise visit. Well, it was supposed to be a surprise for my mom, but I let it slip. I’m not good at keeping secrets. He was only able to stay for a short visit, but it was great seeing him.
Mom did a pretty good and only dead-named and misgendered him a couple of times. She doesn’t do it intentionally, but it takes practice to train your brain to see him as him in your mind’s eye when your memories see him as her. It’s not easy to get practice when you don’t interact very often, but she does keep trying. I still mess up too especially when my mouth is moving faster than my brain, but I do get to interact with him and a couple of my trans friends online, so I get some practice.
It was great spending time with them both, but Tennessee and I were glad to get the house back to ourselves. We’ve been enjoying our evenings watching “All Creatures Great and Small.” I don’t know why I’m so fascinated by the lives of the Brits during that time from the turn of the century through WWII. I just am. One day maybe I’ll dig a little to discover the reason but not today.
I have more important things to do today. It’s supposed to be a day of service, but I am not leaving the house since it’s absolutely frigid outside. So I will do what I can like review Mona Eltahawy’s book and encourage you to read it. And not watching the news or any channel that might boost ratings. I know that’s not hero-level service, but it’s something.
Today also seems like a good day to drink hot beverages and read. The latest Stephanie Plum book is waiting in my queue.
Despite some turbulence (some of it internal but most of it external) that tried to derail our happiness, this has been a wonderful year. So many amazing things happened, the best of which was marrying my beautiful bride.
This also has been a pretty good couple of weeks. I didn’t get furloughed, got to spend time with some family and friends, and Santa was pretty good to me.
For the record, I do still believe in Santa. For me, Santa is not a white dude in a red suit but is the spirit of goodwill and generosity which seems to run richer this time of year.
Anyway, some of my gifts were: two sets of Octavia Butler books, which I am super stoked to read and add to my library; some office supplies, which gave me way more pleasure than is probably normal; and warm fuzzy socks like the ones you get when you go in the hospital.
I also got a new tarot deck “Erotic Tarot” which should prove to be some fun on date nights, and I got a book called “Kitchen Table Tarot” that I’m looking forward to reading.
These two gifts dovetail nicely with a tarot reading I recently did for myself. The Justice card told me to seek my truth and then the Hierophant came up for clarification when I asked what area to seek that truth. The Hierophant is the card for spirituality.
I have been feeling the lack of a consistent spiritual practice. I still enjoy the serenity and clarity chanting brings me but not having a local group has pulled me away from the practice I once found so compelling.
I still find the basic tenets of Buddhism to fit how I believe most closely but I feel like I want to explore where the tarot takes me. I know my wife wishes I could find my way back to more traditional Christianity, but the trauma I feel, triggered most often by my BIL and SIL just living their everyday lives, shows me I still have healing to do.
I received other gifts as well and am very grateful. I have a good life and such generous family and friends!
As we start this new year I am going to try and stay focused on gratitude and balance. Gratitude for what I have and where I am and also for how far I’ve come. Balance in all realms of my life: spiritual, physical, intellectual, and emotional.
I find the intellectual easy, but the others are always a struggle.
So this year I’m going to try to use my love of learning to find ways to help in the areas where I struggle. Instead of setting a goal for a fixed number of books to read this year, I’m going to change the types of books I read.
Well not completely. I belong to three book clubs after all so I will still be reading books for fun. However, I want to explore the kinds of books that inspire and motivate. Not just self-help or how-to books, though there will be some of those, but memoirs and biographies too.
I miss learning, so I’ve also subscribed to “The Great Courses” where they have a vast amount of various subjects to learn about. Tennessee and I have already started a series on modern homesteading. Not sure she’s nearly as interested in it as I am, but I’m curious to see if it sparks new ideas to improve my book. I need some inspiration.
I hope you all will continue to follow along as I learn things and hope that you learn things too.
I can’t live like this. Without this blog, I feel lost and voiceless. I have let them steal my voice.
I may have completely destroyed a fragile relationship yesterday because I let all my fear and frustration spill out because he had the temerity to not be sympathetic to my fears. As if he owes me anything. I’m the one who made him think I was a safe person to discuss our differences in political beliefs safely and calmly.
I tried, I really tried, but after the ridiculous comment he made about how maybe the government should shut down until it figures out how to stop spending money on shrimp on treadmills, I lost my cool and told him it was time for him to go back to his job and that our conversation was over. He immediately said “Well I still want my $75” which infuriated me—as if I’d not pay him for what he was owed because I was unhappy about what he said.
He may never agree to do anything for us ever again unless I apologize, and maybe not even then but I do owe him an apology whether he comes back to work for us or not. My feeling helpless and afraid is not his fault. He has been open to having uncomfortable conversations and actually listening to an opposing view and for an older white man around here that is a pretty remarkable thing.
The fact that he is so susceptible to the bullshit right-wing media spews is just so frustrating.
For the record, the government did spend money for shrimp on treadmills but like all things right-wing it was reported out of context, and it was a total mischaracterization. It was not so much a treadmill as it was a means for scientists to test various substances to determine what is toxic to shrimp in light of how to protect that resource for food and, also by extension, to protect the shrimping industry.
But of course, ‘Shrimp on Treadmills’ is a much sexier soundbite to pull in those already upset by government waste than “Scientists Study How Shrimp’s Immune Systems React to Ocean Warming and Pollution”.
I sent the apology while I was composing this. I felt it couldn’t wait any longer. We’ll see if I am able to save that relationship. In the meantime, this has made me realize that part of my frustration has been not having a voice.
Even if it’s only six people that ever read this blog—even if this blog outs me as not ‘loyal’ to that man (I am, and will always be, a professional and respectful to the Office no matter what man or woman sits in the chair—a hard lesson I learned during my military days)—I need this blog.
I need it to process my complex and confusing emotions. I need it as an outlet for my fear and frustration but also as a way to share my joy and successes. I need it to show my defiance of the patriarchy, white supremacy, and the erosion of democracy.
Living a good life filled with love and joy is an act of defiance.
Living that life here in small-town Tennessee is an act of defiance.
Sharing about that life openly and publicly is an act of defiance.
I can’t save the world, but I can and will continue to try and make small ripples of change by showing that I am just like them despite the ways I am different.
I hope y’all will come along for what’s sure to be a bumpy ride.
This is probably the hardest post I’ve ever written. I am shutting down this blog and will be attempting to “clean up” my social media.
Hiding who I am goes against everything I have worked on for years, but I can’t risk losing my job. I know some will think I’m overreacting, but if Project 2025 is implemented, it is a real possibility. I watched the videos about their plans for the civil service. I remember what he did last time and how close he got before. I’m not going to give them any ammo if I can help it.
I’m a veteran and I know when war is about to be waged on me. I’m hunkering down in my foxhole and hope to wait out the initial barrage. If I were braver and if there weren’t so much at stake I would stand up and fight…loudly and boldly. But just like in my real military career, I’m really only rear support material.
If it were just me, perhaps I could find the courage to be more active, but I have three other souls who depend on me. I can’t risk them. So I will defend my foxhole and support those directly in the fight how and when I can.
I can’t sign off without telling you I managed to reach my goal of reading 100 books.
Books 96 and 97
“Vanilla Chai and a Vanishing Victim” and “Chamomile Tea and a Copycat Crime” by Victoria Tait
Next two books in the Waterwheel Café series. Dotty Sayers is back in the timeline and making guest appearances in the books again. And Keya has found her new beau, the one I got to meet in the last Dotty mystery.
Books 98 and 99
“Light my Fire” and ‘Holy Smokes’ by Katie Mae Allister.
I started this series based on Barbara Rosenblatt being the narrator of the audiobooks. Sadly the free version of the audiobooks were pulled before I finished the series, so I got the ebooks from the library. It wasn’t nearly as good in ebook format though I was able to hear the characters’ voices in my head as I read which helped.
Book 100
“Mint Tea and a Midsummer Murder” by Victoria Tait.
The fifth book of the Waterwheel Cafe series. The final one won’t be out until the end of the month and I will read it when it is available.
I will miss telling you all my stories. I am considering doing a newsletter sent directly to any followers who would still like to read what I have to say so if that’s something you might be interested in, please let me know.
I hope with all my being that I’m wrong and that my fears are unwarranted, but until I know for sure I can’t risk it.
It has been my honor and my pleasure to have connected with you. I am so grateful for all of your support. Please stay safe, take care of yourselves, and be both brave and kind whenever you can.
My biggest accomplishment this week was getting out to vote. It’s weird not to have any ballot initiatives to vote on but since this is a super majority, gerrymandered state they’ve set it up so it’s nearly impossible for citizens to get anything on the ballot. I’m really hoping that this is the election that changes the composition of the State Legislature so that it becomes more balanced, and they actually have to listen to other voices.
I wish I could say how excited and thrilled that I was selecting a woman for every office I voted for, but I can’t. It was great, don’t get me wrong, but this feeling of hopelessness and dread is not going away. Thank goodness there are only 9 days left. I’m not sure my heart or blood pressure can take much more of this. I have been trying to stay off social media and not watch too much news, but I’ve not been entirely successful.
I have managed to get through several books, thanks partly to a very large project I have been assigned in my new job. I realize that sounds weird but this new job, which is actually an old job, is filled with many mind-numbing repetitive tasks which allow for listening to an audiobook while doing them. The bigger the project, the more time is spent on these types of tasks. This past week I spent most of every day doing these types of tasks, thus I was able to finish three audiobooks this week.
Sadly, or maybe fortunately, I am now finished with those tasks for this project and none of the others are so big so my audiobook listening while working is done for now. It’s been quite a change of pace, but I find I am grateful for how fast the days are going. I need these next 9 days to pass as quickly as possible.
I’m hoping now that I’ve voted and have done what I could, that I can let go of some of this angst. I have stuff to do with birthdays and the holidays coming and we’re running out of time for me to do homemade gifts if I don’t get cracking.
Book 90
“Yuletide Market Murder” by Victoria Tait
This is the last Dotty Sayers Mystery available on Kindle Unlimited. The next one won’t be out until January, so I’ve started her spinoff series about Dotty’s best friend Keya.
Books 91 and 92
“Earl Grey and Shallow Graves” and “Darjeeling and a Deadly Disappearance” by Victoria Tait
These are the first two books in the Waterwheel Cafe Mystery series where I get all the same lovely and quirky characters from the Dotty Sayers series except Dotty, though based on the timeline she will likely make brief appearances.
Book 93
“Track of the Cat” written by Nevada Barr and narrated by Barbara Rosenblat
I love this book series! Anna Pigeon is a wonderfully complex and imperfect character. This is the November selection for my online book club. I read it years ago and was happy to reread it for discussion. I had hoped that enough time and books had passed that I wouldn’t remember whodunit. Alas, I did remember about a third of the way in, however, I couldn’t remember how or why so that was good enough.
And as Barbara Rosenblatt is one of my favorite narrators, I found another series to start just because she’s the narrator.
Books 94 and 95
“You Slay Me” and “Fire Me Up” written by Katie MacAlister and narrated by Barbara Rosenblat.
Barbara does a great job at voicing serious characters like Anna Pigeon, but she is at her best voicing quirky characters where the author injects humor into the plot, scenes, and dialog. The first two books in this paranormal romance series about Aisling Grey are fun and the spicy scenes are pretty good. This is not high-brow stuff, but definitely fun.
Have a great week y’all and send positive vibes my way if you have any to spare. Or better yet send them to Kamala.
I finished my first full pay period in my new job, and it wasn’t too bad. I had forgotten how boring and mind-numbing some of it could get but as it requires minimal concentration I was able to listen to my next book club audiobook during those tasks.
This new job really has the potential for me to set up a routine that will facilitate healthy practices and, I am hoping, time for creative pursuits. I’ve been writing in my journal trying to sort out some stuff but the only creative writing I’ve been doing is this blog and it’s not very heavy on creativity.
I’m feeling almost overwhelmed by the need to write but nothing inspiring comes to mind. There are no characters having conversations in my head, no action scenes unfolding, and no settings or plots revealing themselves. With as many books as I’ve been reading, you would think it would trigger something.
I know part of the reason why is that this damn election has completely infiltrated so much of my life. I spent hours the other day “educating” a former high school classmate I’m FB friends with on the correct information about how FEMA works and how damaging the spreading of misinformation is.
Early voting has started here and I’m going to cast my ballot this week. Maybe that will be enough to let go of some of this angst, though I doubt it. This anxiety will not likely go away until after the results are announced. Then there will be either joy or despair. Please universe, God, Goddess, beneficial deities, or whatever, please, please, please let it be joy!
In the meantime, I’m spending some of my time fielding phone calls from my mom about which of the things left in my old room I want to keep, throw out, or donate because she’s preparing it for my son moving in with her. I feel guilty that I’m not there helping but we’re dealing with some medical stuff here that makes going back tough right now. They are going to need to figure it out without me and to be honest, I think my input would not be good at this point anyway.
All this is to say that my head is not a creative space right now, and it’s causing me some grief. Maybe I should try some other forms of creativity. A couple of weeks back we painted some Fall/Halloween decorations, and it was fun. Maybe the wife and I can do some more of that.
Anyway, that’s enough of my entitled whining and complaining about my first-world problems. Hope y’all are taking care of yourselves and reading really good books!
Books 85 and 86
“Daffodils and Deadly Deeds” and “Halloween Parade Peril” by Victoria Tait
These are the next two books in the Dotty Sayers mystery series. I am still enjoying them very much and can’t wait to read the next one. They are being slowly released on Kindle Unlimited so now that I’ve caught up to the schedule I will have to wait days between to get the next ones.
Book 87
“Buried in the Stacks” Written by Allison Brook and narrated by Mia Gaskin
I have no idea how this ended up on my library shelf. It’s part of a series I’ve never read before, and it wasn’t the first book in the series either so I was missing some history. The author did a decent job of providing enough so it would not hurt the story though. It was entertaining but I probably will not go and find the first one or the rest.
Books 88 and 89
“The Clairvoyant Countess” and “Kaleidoscope” by Dorothy Gilman
These were super fun books by the author of the Mrs. Pollifax books. I wish there were more, but she only wrote the two and as she’s now dead there won’t be more and that’s a shame.
Only eleven books left until I reach my reading goal for this year. I’ve got this!
Sorry about not posting last week, we’ve both been struggling a bit with our health. I actually started a blog last weekend, but it was very angry and filled with way too much political angst. I decided to wait a day before posting and when I read it again, I decided not to post it.
I think I was also very stressed out about starting my new job with my new boss, which I did on Monday. We had a marathon staff/training session most of that Monday because both the boss and the only other trained team member will both be on leave for big chunks of October, so she wanted to give us enough so that we could be busy while they were gone.
I was so exhausted after that I didn’t even have the energy to commit to watching TV let alone read a book. I spent way too much time on TikTok instead but didn’t sleep well when I finally crashed.
However, I think I’ll be able to settle into a bit of a routine soon and I do like how fast the days go now that I’m busy. The key is going to be to schedule movement breaks, and maybe accomplish at least one little thing each time I move…like emptying the dishwasher while waiting for my coffee to brew.
I started work on my first project and I’m enjoying the work so far. I’m not a fan of all the administrative parts of my job, but I love the puzzle-solving aspect, which is the part I’m working on now with this first project.
I can say that by Friday at 5 pm I was ‘plum tuckered out’. (I understand what tuckered out means but I have no idea what the plum has to do with it?)
On Wednesday, my doctor prescribed blood pressure meds. I confess that I did not pick them up until yesterday. The message from Walgreens said I had until the 20th to get them or I’d have to get the prescription reissued. That meant I didn’t have to get it right away right? No, I know that’s not what it meant. So I picked them up when I was out getting our Walmart groceries, but I haven’t taken them out of the bag yet.
Tennessee and I are going out of town next weekend so I probably should start taking the pills, so I have some time to get used to the meds before being on the road right? But I’m still grieving the loss of my ability to brag about my normal blood pressure and if I open up those meds then it’s a fact I will have to face.
Can’t I just be in denial a few more days?
One thing I’m good at when facing struggles is to completely ignore them by reading books. I found a fun cozy murder series that I have been devouring so I am now ahead of schedule again. Here’s what I’ve read over the past two weeks:
Book 75
“Catmint Catastrophe”- Familiar Kitten Mysteries#22 by Sara Bourgeois
There are still more books left in this series but I’m bored with it so for now I’m moving on.
Book 76-84
“Hour is Come”; “Fake Death”; “Valued for Murder”; “Bidding for Revenge”; “Gavels, Tinsel and Murder”; “Antique Tragedy;” “Priceless Betrayal”; “Deadly Performance”; and “Holly, Baubles, and Murder”
Books .5 and 1-8 in the Dotty Sayers Antique Mystery series by Victoria Tait
Contemporary British cozy mysteries set in the Cotswold for the first handful of books about a young military widow who gets caught up in solving murders and finds out she’s good at it. They are fun and easy to read, and I’m very much enjoying them.
Only 16 more books until I hit my goal and I still have two and a half months left. Easy-peasy right?
Have a great week my friends and thank you for hanging around!
This is going to be a short edition because we have guests this weekend. It is going to be J-Dawg’s fourth birthday tomorrow and we’re celebrating today. His EE and mimi bought him a swing set for our backyard which we are hopefully going to unveil later today though it’s looking like Helene has not fully let go of her rain. More on that in a bit.
So, I need one more book before the end of Monday to be fully back on track to my 100 books in 2024. I had an opportunity to do tons of reading on Thursday night because the wife was in Nashville with her bestie at a Shelby Lynn concert.
I, however, realized I hadn’t finished the latest season of Doctor Who, so I binge-watched that instead. I love, love, love this new Doctor and how sensitive and queer he is. Still so very lonely though. And I’m not sure I like how heavy-handed they were with the racism episode. I know it needed to be addressed as the Doctor has never been black before (not counting the one played briefly by Jo Martin). They were a bit more subtle with the sexism during Jodie Whittaker’s reign though maybe that is because they were able to put a jab into most episodes instead of dealing with it head-on in only one.
While I watched, Mother Nature began crying busloads of tears. The remnants of Hurricane Helene dumped so much water that our backyard was a lake whose edge was a mere four inches from the back door. Tennessee and her bestie made it back without any issue though because the rain didn’t fully hit that part of the state. We didn’t get the wind here, thank goodness, nor did we lose power.
We were very lucky, but many others were not. Governor Lee has declared a state of emergency here because of the severe flooding in the east part of the state. Millions of others are still without power all over the South and way too many people died. Storms just don’t normally hit still at hurricane levels this far inland.
I heard a scientist say that it’s not accurate to say climate change caused this hurricane. It still would have formed, but climate change has a direct impact on how big and severe these new storms are. I will never understand those who deliberately deny science.
Book 72
Cinderella is Dead
Written by Kalyan Bayron and narrated by Bahni Turpin
Ever wonder what happened after Cinderella took up residence in the castle? What if Prince Charming hadn’t been charming? What if the fairy godmother was actually a wicked witch complicit in the subjugating of the women of the kingdom? The dystopian sapphic twist on the classic fairy tale.
Book 73
Cloudy with a Chance of Murder – Familiar Kitten Mysteries #21
Written by Sara Bourgeois
There are 28 total books in this series. Honestly, I’m not quite sure why I’m still reading these except that they are free, and they are short novels that read pretty fast, so it helps me to get caught up on my count.
Book 74
Nothing to See Here
Written by Kevin Wilson and narrated by Marin Ireland
This is the October selection for one of my book clubs is not a typical book for us. It felt like there was supposed to be a lesson to be learned from this just slightly sapphic and just slightly paranormal story, but I couldn’t figure it out. I’m not a fan of men who write woman protagonists…they never quite feel fully formed to me or they are way too stereotyped. This book was no exception.
Baby Gay When You're Fat and Gray - All Grown Up 