Is TikToking a Word?

One of my friends asked how it was going with my ‘red state’ living. It’s been an adjustment, that’s for sure. For instance, I went to paint pottery with my Bestie last week and I still have not heard from the owner if the pieces are ready to pick up. I even called to leave a message. Tennessee reminded me yet again that things move slowly here and to give her a chance to get back with me.

However, I can’t help but wonder if she’s not calling me back because of the rainbow veteran shirt I was wearing. After all her voice message says, “Have a ‘Blessed’ Day” and it’s the pronunciation with one syllable, not two. I can’t help but feel a little paranoid. I want to believe that my business and money are more important than my politics, but it is really hard, and the fact that everything moves so slowly here does not help my paranoia.

Another thing I am sure is a direct result of the move is that I missed one of my book club meetings. I forgot to put it on my calendar and because I had already read the book my focus has been elsewhere, so it wasn’t on my radar. It’s a casualty of the chaos of moving and it means it’ll be another month before I see the faces of my book club friends again.

I miss my friends. I miss texting and saying, “Want to meet up for coffee?” or “Let’s go see a movie”.

I saw the FB post of my friends winning trivia on Tuesday. I had forgotten about it being Tuesday. How could I forget? I miss trivia. I miss laughing with those amazing women every week. I miss the sense of belonging when I am with them.

I also love being here. I love the (mostly) peace and quiet. I love making the house our home. I love going to sleep each night wrapped in the arms of the woman I love then waking up next to her every morning. I love the neurotic animals who rule the roost here. I don’t even really mind the rain because it makes everything so green and beautiful here.

This weekend we have social events with other queer couples, and I can’t wait to be around them. I’m really looking forward to it because I miss my community and I’m hoping to build a new one here.  

I have a therapy appointment soon and it should be an interesting one. Thank goodness I didn’t have to give my therapist up. I know I could make the adjustment without her but I’m glad I won’t have to. She’s always good at helping me get focused on the right things.

I wonder if I should tell her that I’m spending way too much time TikToking? Is that even a word? My FYP is full of politics and queer content which is also highly political most of the time. I wonder if it’s making my paranoia worse. Probably. Maybe I should watch some more Masterpiece Theater instead. Or perhaps I need a trip to the library to pick up a cozy mystery.  I know I have a lot of TBR books, but I need to support my local library right?

This post feels way more stream-of-consciousness than usual. I apologize if it comes across that way. I blame staying up way too late binge-watching the above-mentioned Masterpiece Theater.

Be well my friends.